Thursday, October 30, 2008

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Jennifer Kelly Beisner: Remembering My Aunt Tobe

Jennifer Kelly Schutz was born October 7, 1969 to her parents Jack and Carole, and to two loving siblings, a sister, Susan, and a brother, Michael. She was a cute little baby and had beautiful blue eyes. Jennifer was always a special person and she did require some special attention. At the age of 12 she was diagnosed with Diabetes, and from what I remember, she wasn't too fawned of it. Her growing up years were already somewhat difficult with her parents going through a divorce with her siblings and her right in the middle. Jennifer was to say the least a bit rebellious; there are some crazy stories to go along with it all too.

She graduated from Indio High School in 1986, and began her journey of life. Her journey took her many places and into many different things. Jennifer struggled with a lot of battles in her life, and she let those things really dictate the things she did. In the early 90's she was treated at UCLA for the eating disorders that plagued her. She was able to complete the treatments, and was doing really good for a while. Her great grandmother, known to everyone as Gramsy, died shortly after, which affected her in many ways. She felt very close to her and in a sense felt lost with having her gone. Again, Jennifer in her own way bounced back from her trials and went on with life. Anyone that Jennifer came in contact with shortly realized the type of person she was. She loved having her schedule of things to do in a day, and made a routine that she stuck to 150%; and any deviation from that routine resulted in an irritated Jennifer. She just liked to have things the way she wanted them, and it was her way of staying stable. Thats just the way she was.

Jennifer was very blessed in her life to have loving parents that really took care of her very well. She was able to do things and have the things that some people can only dream of. She lived in beautiful places and homes, always had a nice clean car to drive and never really wanted for anything, although, everyone knew there was something new she always had her eye on.

Jennifer has had an affect on everyone that she ever came into contact with. Each of their lives have been affected by simply knowing her. Jennifer passed away last year, tomorrow will actually be a year to the day, however today would have been her 39th birthday, and my purpose in writing this. Jennifer is my mom's baby sister, my aunt, who in no words could I ever express how much she meant to me. In the last few years we had the chance to become very close, we became best friends I guess you could say. We talked on the phone more than you could ever imagine and it happened frequently on a daily basis. We were very comfortable talking to each other about just about anything. I never realized how much I enjoyed talking to her until I no longer had the opportunity. The day I found out she had died, I felt like I lost a huge part of me. It had been a long time since I was that upset about something and at first I wasn't sure how I was going to deal with it. I missed my aunt, my friend, and our relationship.

In the following weeks after her death, I came to a realization that has really helped me through it all. Jennifer always pushed me to do my best in everything, and encouraged me to reach for all of my dreams and make them happen. She was always there to support me in every endeavor I took part of, whether she thought it was the best thing for me or not, she was always behind me. I realized that none of that has changed. She may not be a phone call away anymore, but she is still there for me supporting me the same way she always had.

I learned a lot of things from my relationship with my Aunt Tobe, I don't think that she ever realized how much she helped me. I was able to help her on many occasions to lighten her load, and spend time with her at her best times and her not so best times. All in all we had a lot of fun times. There isn't a day that has gone by since, that she hasn't been on my mind. Songs that I call, her songs will come on the radio and I can vividly recall her rocking out to them and playing them loudly, or seeing things that remind me of her, or place we went together, its all something I deeply cherish.When good things have happened it is still my first instinct to call her and tell her all about it. And it could be just a simple small little detail, but she was always happy for me.

I will never forget her smile when she was happy for me. Her laugh is still ever present in my mind and I remember how much my friends and I were able to make her laugh. And she laughed at us a lot. The happy times are what I remember the most, and even every memory that I have whether it was in good times or bad, can always bring a smile to my face because of who Tobe was. I love Jennifer still more than ever, and I know that she will always remember the friendship and relationship we had, and still always be there to tell me, " loving ya Jay!

Conference Weekend Pictures

I would have moved these around but I havent figured out how to do that yet....

Long but fun Conference Weekend.

This last weekend was General Conference for church, which was AWESOME!, I listened to the talks I missed, and the whole thing was a good learning experience for me. I know that I have the reputation of not paying attention due to my "Munchhausen Syndrome A.D.D. on-sets", but I really did pay attention to the talks and got a lot out of them. When I look at what General Conference is usually about, there are I guess some categories that all the talks fall under.
1. Emotional Talks- Ones that make you act.
2. "The Ripper" Talks- Ones that make you say yikes!
3. The F.O.B. Talks- Ones you can barely understand.... HUH?
4. The "Yes, I totally agree" Talks- Ones you catch yourself nodding your head to.
5. The Hit Home Talks- Ones that make you feel like you are being talked to directly.

The talks of this conference made me feel hopeful about the future and gave me some other good guidelines to make it all successful. I think that is what conference is all about. Elder Wirthlin, made everyone laugh with stories of his childhood, and his sports days as a young man. President Utchdorf explained to each of us how to be full of hope and faith. President Monson gave us all the encouragement to live life to the fullest and to be happy and have joy. Elder Holland, who I will be honest, am not normally a huge fan of his talks, but I think that his talk in the Saturday Afternoon Session, was my favorite. I could go on and on about all of the talks and how good they were.

Besides the fun that General Conference actually added to the weekend, it was awesome to see my friends too. Brooke, Mandi, Todd and Andrea came up from California, and we had a ton of fun. I will just post some pictures rather than try to write it all out. I was sad the weekend had to end, cause I didn't want to come back to Idaho alone, I would have rather gone home with everyone else, but it was a nice break to see everyone.